Thursday, October 28, 2021

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30 Of The Best Inventions Found Only On The Internet

What’s better than a new gadget? Well, in my personal (and highly regarded) opinion: NOTHING! That’s why I put together this list of affordable new gadgets I found online, essentially giving you keys to the future. There are so many items on this list that make your life easier — in fact, I predict some of these things will actually solve some of your problems!

Who doesn’t want a custom-sized tuna can strainer, or a salt gun to eliminate bugs? Like, a literal bug gun called a Bug-A-Salt Rifle — almost guaranteeing you’ll be roleplaying a Bruce Willis/Duke Nukem hybrid in your living room before the week is over.

TL;DR? Keep scrolling and improve your life.

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How many iPhone cables have you bought in the last five years? Too many to count? That’s because most lightning cables are absolute crap and rarely last longer than a year. Don’t fall victim to this textbook planned-obsolesce tech scam again! The Amazon Basics supercharged 2.4A cable comes with a lifetime warranty, so you’re covered if it ever fails. Charge your way into the future.

Purify and enhance your bathing water with this high-pressure revitalizing shower head from Lokby. It has a built-in fifteen-stage filtration system, which easily removes metals and other impurities that are typically found in municipal water systems. The filter even adds vitamin C back into the water, resulting in more vibrant skin. If you’ve never used a filtered shower head, you’re missing out.

Don’t let pesky societal norms with basic anatomy stop you from going pee when nature calls by picking up a GoGirl female urination device. It’s essentially a portable pee funnel, allowing you to just open your zipper and let freedom ring like every god-fearing male has done since the beginning of time. Don’t let long hikes or outdoor festivals cause you any more stress, when you need to go — just go, girl!

Where do you think all the junk in your dryer lint trap comes from? It comes from your wardrobe slowly disintegrating due, in part, to the harsh chemicals in your detergent and dryer sheets. Curb that issue with these all-natural Friendsheep Wool Dryer Balls. They’re made from 100% New Zealand cotton and are totally chemical free — be honest, who doesn’t want ecological penguins in their dryer?! They can even reduce drying time by up to 40%, which will save you money on electricity bills in the long run.

Remember how cool it was to have a multi-tool back in elementary school? Now you can relive your social glory days with this updated and customizable multi-tool from Clips. Easily add or remove accessories to the carbon fiber base using the removable screws, with room for up to 28 keys! Each order comes with everything you need to get started — including a bottle opener, a SIM card pin, a bunch of rubber washers, and even a separate cash stash container.

Not only is this bottle opener functional, but it’s also the perfect addition to your unlicensed Marvel merchandise collection. According to the Amazon page…actually, you know what? You should just click this link now and read the in-house product description in its entirety — you won’t regret it!

Stop fussing with mangled headphone cables and start placing them in this cord organizer from TOPHOME. The simple yet modern design keeps your headphones untangled by wrapping the cord around a sturdy base with perforated edges, using a button flap to lock everything in place. It’s made with 100% genuine leather and the button is stainless steel, so you don’t have to worry about it falling apart after a month.

Have you ever wanted to make sounds from your mouth louder than most local noise ordinance thresholds? These loud (+142dB) whistles will do the trick. Easily amplify your calls for help in the wild (or calls to settle down your out-of-control roommate) by simply blowing on this ultra-powered HyperWhistle, and you’ll be heard for miles. It comes packaged with hearing protection, something you’ll definitely need.

Have a screw loose? Grip it safely by magnetizing your screwdriver before you start the work. The Katzco Precision Magnetizer will polarize your tools both ways, keeping unwanted magnetism under control, or adding charge to anything that needs it. Screwdrivers, screws, nails, hammers, washers — magnetize whatever!

Stop mixing up your blush shades with that overused and under-washed makeup brush. This is not healthy for your brushes, and it’s definitely not good for your expensive makeup. Stop committing fashion crimes, stop being a coward, and start washing your brushes with the machine brush cleaner from CCHOME. This $20 device will extend the life of your makeup and brushes, and it will pay for itself 10 times over within the first year.

It’s insane how much of my hair comes out in the shower. The hair slowly builds up in the drain, and eventually, like clockwork, issues arise. It’s not something I enjoy dealing with — at all. The TubShroom eliminates the problem altogether by creating a trap for loose hairs, saving your drain (and your morning) from certain doom. It’s the perfect solution for all the longhairs out there who tend to shed in the shower. Heck, it was even a 2018 Time Magazine honorable mention for best inventions of the year, and it’s only $12!

Effectively hide all your private items inside this multi-functional hairbrush. The cavity is 4 in x 1.25 in, making it perfect for stashing cash, or any other stuff you need to conceal from prying eyes — like ‘dry herbs.’ It also comes with a smell-proof bag, so you can stop your stinky ‘dry herbs’ from attracting prying noses as well.

Stop trimming your facial hair all willy-nilly and get this beard shaping tool from Monster & Son. The curves and angles on this handheld trimming guide make it easy to look like a more successful version of Dan Bilzarian. To be honest, that’s not very difficult because he basically lied about everything he did — but his beard did look cool.

Stop making a mess of breakfast and get this pancake mixer/dispenser into your cooking arsenal. It’s super easy to use: just put the mix into the bottle, add water, add the whisking ball, and shake vigorously. Then, just pour the batter from the bottle to the hot griddle and you’re done. This thing makes perfect pancakes every single time.

Full disclosure: I have no idea how this thing works. It’s literally just a stainless steel block shaped like a bar of soap (or a fish, or a bulb of garlic?) Yet, somehow, it removes any sulfuric molecules on your skin, apparently leaving you clean. Can someone please explain this to me? I assume it has some sort of black magic embedded into the cell structure, because this thing absolutely works — both in the shower and in the kitchen. Who figured this technology out? Keebler elves? Elon Musk? I need to know.

Do your shoes stink so much that you’re aware of it? Stop being sus and pick up these charcoal-based odor-removing shoe bags from Moso Naturals. They use bamboo charcoal to quickly absorb the bad smells instead of covering them up, making your shoes stink-free in time for post-COVID dinner parties.

Get your bathroom appliances out from under that sink and put them somewhere more practical. This door-mounted basket has enough room for all your beauty devices, and even has two holsters for additional brush and blow dryer storage. It’s a win-win, reducing the clutter and adding storage — my two favorite outcomes.

Don’t waste your time ironing outfits in a hotel room and start packing the PurSteam Garment Steamer in your luggage. It works by shooting out high-pressure steam from the spout, effectively melting away wrinkles from all your garments. Warning: once you try one of these, you will almost certainly throw away that 19th-century ironing setup you have at home.

A pen that doubles as a multi-tool? Sign me the heck up! This bad boy comes with multiple pen tips, a bottle opener, an LED flashlight — and so much more. It’s made from aircraft-grade aluminum, making it extremely durable and ensuring a long lifespan. TakeFlight is US veteran-owned and manufactures all their products right here in the good ol’ USA. This pen is literally mightier than the sword.

Do you need a blue aura illuminating the inside your toilet bowl? Yes, yes you do. This toilet bowl light might be listed as a “gag gift,” but I guarantee it does what it claims — light up your bathroom with 8 different colors from inside the toilet. Its motion detected, making it easy for your family to find the toilet even in the dead of night.

Put these gold whiskey stones into your drinks and be the strangest person at any party. These things are essentially gold-colored stainless steel cubes used to replace ice cubes in a cold drink, and they work amazingly well. They’re totally food-safe, but beware — people are going to stare at you and your gold cubes.

Who couldn’t use a few more hands when shopping? Pick up one of these grips and be amazed at how strong you actually are. The Mighty Handle will have you feeling like The Rock in The Mummy Returns when you leave the store handling 15 bags by yourself. They use hooks to distribute the weight, keeping you balanced to and from your car (or pyramid tomb.) Pick a couple of these bad boys up and activate Beast Mode on your next shopping trip.

Cut the cheese at your next party and have the guests cheering with excitement! Okay, now that we got those jokes out of the way — seriously, this cheese slicer is perfect. Cut slices easily and evenly all the way down the block, every time. Great for cheddar and other medium-hard cheeses.

If you’re drunk enough to spill the wine, then you’re drunk enough to need protection…for your wine bottle. The Wine Condom is another gag gift that proven to be a runaway success, this time by solving an age-old question: how do you reseal a wine bottle? Slip one of these booze johnnys on your next bottle of Vinho Verde if the afternoon bubbles start getting to your head too soon.

Have you ever wanted to strain the liquid out of a can while also keeping everything else in said can? If you answered yes, rest assured that this product does exist. The Amazon gods have listened. Be Thankful.

Your phone probably allows wireless charging, but my guess is you’re still using outdated last-gen cables like a dope. Stop! It’s about time you consolidate all your charging needs to this wireless charging pad and enter the next stage of smartphone evolution.

Clean your microwave the modern way — by placing water and lemon juice into a silicone cartoon character and turning the microwave on. No, this isn’t a fake Tik-Tok lifehack — it’s simply how us millennials have shaped the future to be.

Carry one of these BEARZ Outdoor Pocket Blankets with you to always be ready for a picnic, the beach, or anything in between. This thing packs down to the size of an apple and only weighs about 4 ounces, so it’ll definitely fit in your bag. You can even use it as a poncho if it starts to rain — you’ll honestly be ready for anything. Except maybe a zombie apocalypse; you should get additional supplies for that.

Car seat buckles may be designed for safety, but my god, they could have come up with a better system than a button that is impossible to press. Well, one grandma eventually did come up with a better system: the UnbuckleMe buckle assist. This thing went on Shark Tank and received offers from all five sharks. Basically, it works by offsetting the button and creating a simple lever, allowing you to use less force in order to release the buckle. If you have arthritis, or just a fussy car seat, this is perfect for you.

Make pest control fun by hunting vermin with this literal salt rifle. I don’t know what more to say about this one, to be honest. If you like fun and hate bugs, then Amazon has a gun to sell you.

If you use soap on your cast iron pan, you’re an idiot. I’m sorry, but it’s true. The whole point of a cast iron pan is to season it with oils and fats to create a natural (and flavorful) non-stick surface. Start cleaning your cast iron correctly with this chainmail net that scrubs away scraps while preserving the oils — and most importantly won’t scratch the pan. Just some water and scrub with this net, that’s it!

Do you have a mess of cables by your TV or computer? Organize all of it with these colorful magnetic ties that mold into whatever shape you need. Want to keep your gym towel off the ground? Pop one of these onto whatever machine you’re using and instantly have a hook. To be honest, you can use these for basically anything…

Always have the correct nuts and bolts at hand…literally. Turn your wrist into storage while you work on your projects using this magnetic wristband from MagnoGrip. Never let a lost screw pull you out of the zone while you’re working again.

Is there anything more annoying than trying to figure out where to place your sauce-covered cooking utensils while preparing a meal? This rack solves that problem by giving you an elevated spot for utensils, complete with a surface to catch any saucy drippings. Keep your cutting board clean and your spoons saucy.

This fan uses tiny LEDs on the blades to magically display a clock face while it spins. I mean, it’s not really magic actually — but anyway, I digress. You can also program it to say whatever you want. For instance, you could show the dystopian nature of our reality with “Be afraid: I am sentient” or “The Matrix is real.”

Keep your device upright on a table to watch reruns of 90 Day Fiance, or keep it attached to a pole so you can pretend to exercise while scrolling through memes — it’s all possible with this bad larry. But in all seriousness, this thing works great for keeping your phone accessible while biking or anything else that requires a mount or stand. Fits and secures almost any device!

Fruits and veggies become ripe by secreting ethylene gas. Unfortunately, this process never stops and will end up ruining your produce as quickly as the fall of the USSR. Enter the gas-absorbing BlueApple. Don’t let another single over-ripe banana destroy your stash of perfectly grown organic romaine ever again. One bad apple might spoil the barrel, but one of these good apples might actually save everything else in your fridge.

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